Sail on down the line

My page is moving. I have run out of space here. The new page is at:

http://webpages.charter.net/rdwagnerjr

See ya there...

If we are the Body

Lots of people latched onto this song a year or so ago. “If we are the body, why aren’t his arms reaching, why aren’t his hands healing, why aren’t his words teaching.” It was all over mainstream Christian radio and a huge hit for Casting Crowns. It was quite an indictment as well.

I want to get something very straight. What you see me write and what you hear me say concerning the church is purely motivated for my love of it. I love God’s people and am so blessed to be a part of his body. I don’t want anyone to get any ideas otherwise. Many would find it perfectly understandable if I hated the church and wanted nothing to do with it. Growing up I was, in many cases, spiritually and emotionally abused. I watched churches, groups of people, part ways over the smallest of things. Just recently a large congregation had a group leave. 5 Months later, the breakaway group split. I saw this preacher stand in the pulpit and rail on that preacher across town. I saw a pastor berate homosexuals and liberals and condemned them to hell with no hope that even THEY could be saved. And he did this every Sunday. I saw business men as church leaders and later found out their dealings weren’t Christ like at all. I’ve been under a pastor that told outright lies to my face and then about me after I was gone. I’ve listened to friends tell me they were preached at every Sunday because of the length of their hair. I’ve heard stories of churches in this area years ago who printed on their signs and materials, “No Long Hairs Allowed”. I recently read a letter that implied that I may be saved but not repentant because the music I like is not ‘solid gospel’. I’ve seen TV Evangelists distort the Bible and profit from their ‘sheep’. There are churches, RIGHT HERE IN OUR CITY, that still espouse outright racism and hate for blacks. I could go on, but the more I type the sadder I get.

I love the church. I love God’s people. I love Jesus. I hope, everyday, that I can follow him better. I’m thankful that when I do fall short of his glory, it’s ok. He redeems me. So when you see something here that seems a little harsh, well, it may be. But just know, I am looking to be a catalyst. A catalyst of change. Not to change the Gospel, but to understand it better and learn to practice it and then pass it on.

I love the church, and I want to see it for what it could be and not what it is. I don’t want my children to grow up with the same experiences I had with church and Christian culture. I want better for them. Will you help me?

There must be some misunderstanding

You’ve got to be careful with your blog posts folks. Unfortunately, one post can be used to represent who you are and how you think, even if it doesn’t FULLY represent who you are. If someone only knows you from your posts, they can not get a well rounded view of who you are.

I recently received an email from someone I know, but who hasn’t really been around me much lately. My first real blog criticism! You haven't really made it until you've made someone mad. I didn’t even know they read it to be honest, but was glad to find out they do. They took real offense to my last post and I am sorry about that. I’m only human and I won’t always say or write something that is acceptable to all. And when you write something, much is lost in tone and inflection.

So, do I quit blogging? Heck no. Am I more careful? Maybe, but I won’t sacrifice who I am and what I think just because someone didn’t like what I had to say. But maybe I’ll try to be more well rounded. Or maybe I need to go back to being silly all the time on here. Nah. :)

Those of you who do read regularly, thanks for reading. It tickles me to no end that I have people who care about what I say. And please, if I say something that bothers you or you have a question about, then please, let’s talk about it. But please try not to wage a full on attack. And don’t call me names or make assumptions about me before we do talk about it. Just went through that, and don’t want to again.

Take a load off Manny

NOTE (4/28/05): I was taken to task for overgeneralizing below. Let it be known, I was not talking about all Christians or all churches in the following post. It was a particular letter in the paper that set me off and I apologize for anything offensive.
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So, the newspaper has been full of letters lately bemoaning the fact that their ‘solid gospel’ station has changed their format to hip hop. I truly feel for those folks. Something they love and grew to expect is now gone. The station was simply making a business decision and it unfortunately hurt a part of our community.

That said, some of the letters have been very telling. I have witnessed, throughout my life, a church that runs from our culture. They very rightly stand on the words, ‘be in the world but not of it.” Unfortunately, they have concentrated so much on the later, that they are no longer anywhere to be seen ‘in’ the world. When I read these letters, I see good, God fearing folk who do not understand the culture we live in. They have disassociated to the point that ‘going into all the world’ is hardly possible anymore.

They say things like today’s “gospel” music does not represent the faith of our fathers.’ And that those who listen to Christian music that sounds like secular music may be saved but have failed to repent. I’m sorry, but I just can not accept such talk. If I can acknowledge these folks mean well, they should be able to acknowledge there are others who may approach things a bit differently but love Jesus no less. It’s a basic misunderstanding of our culture and the great commission. Missionaries adapt to foreign culture, why don’t we adapt to our own? Let’s be missional in our own backyard.

It’s getting harder and harder for me to deal with this as my eyes seem to continually open to a city that is not reaching it’s community. To borrow from Petra, they are looking through rose colored stain glass windows. If they won’t get out of their safe, church buildings and really learn about the people who they say need Jesus, then who will go? They want the homosexual to come Jesus, while never making the effort to get to know them. They want the alcoholic to come Jesus, but won’t go out to meet him on the street. They want the prostitute, the drug user, the punk, the goth, the guy with earrings and tats, the young single mother, the ________, to come to Jesus, but only on their terms. They want they’re sons and daughters to come to Jesus, but only if they come to ‘church’. Let’s go to these people on Jesus’ terms and not ours.

I have to be very careful. I do not wish to be harsh, or without grace, but it’s really time that we start to call these things out. We need to challenge one another in our walks, be iron that sharpens iron.

I am sure that I have much I could learn from some of these folks. But I wonder if they’d teach me if I showed up with my earrings in?

Where do we go from here

I noticed something odd at work the other day. I've been there for nearly three months now, made some friends, and feel like a part of the team. So what did I find odd? Looking around, nearly everyone had pictures up of their families and personal effects strewn about. I've yet to make any mark like that in my work area. Every other job I've had, that was a first week kinda thing.

So I wondered, why? Has my job situation the last two years robbed me of something that I used to enjoy? Has it made me afraid to feel too comfortable and too safe in my work? Am I going to let there be less of a personal connection between my life and my work now?

This is just something folks in my generation are having to deal with. I honestly haven't answered the above questions. Maybe next week I'll get some pictures up, who knows. But I can hardly say that and not think at the same time, maybe next week I won't have a job. Maybe the week after, the rug will be pulled out from under me again.

I don't want to live like that, but hey, it's where I am. I have to be honest.

Oh!!! I hope to kick off the Jamsessions soon. I was thinking a cookout at the house towards the middle/end of May. Maybe Ern and I can get the website up before then.

Hoosh, I'm prayin' for you man. And remember, you aren't going to be able to make God stop loving you.

Run like the River...

Fellow blogger, musician, and friend Rob Price asked me to help him get the word out on something. His church will have worship leader Charlie Hall in on May 22nd. It's a steal of a deal at 5 bucks in advance. Charlie is great worship leader and genuine good guy. Plus his ears are pierced, like me, so he's got to be cool. Right? Anyway... Click the pic below for more information on the concert. Find out more about Charlie here.

I wanna scream at the top of my lungs

The following is something I found on the web. It is a hypothetical but for lots of folks, could be very real. Pastor Kerry called it brutal. Indeed it is. There are some problems with it and some doctrinal errors, but it is worth reading. Fasten your seatbelts...

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As a 24-year-old youth leader, I have had many conversations with teens and twenty-somethings, both churched and unchurched. If we truly listened, they might say something like this:

Dear Church, Leaders:

By now, some of you are beginning to notice that we, the high school upperclassmen, college students, and young adults, have lost interest and have decided that our time and money is better spent elsewhere. For those who actually want to know why, here is your chance to listen – and we know that this may be hard since many of you have learned to pretend that you’re listening to ease your aching consciences. Just so you know, you haven’t fooled us; we can see through your pretentious attempts. However, this is one last chance to hear us out – we may not speak again, so fasten your seatbelts.

Whether you realize it or not, we have actually learned very much from you, our priests, pastors, teachers, and parents. Sadly, we have learned more from your lives than from your lectures and sermons. We have learned that it is much more important to seek financial stability from high-paying, prestigious jobs and collect needless junk than it is to pursue a life of self-sacrifice and adventure. We have learned to evaluate others on the basis of race, gender, income level, and appearance. We have learned that memorizing mindless creeds and analyzing theological systems have little power in making us better people.

We have learned how to outsource responsibility. We have learned to leave childcare to the professionals, caring for the poor to the government, social justice to the ACLU and NAACP, reproductive decisions to Planned Parenthood, and environmental awareness to the Darwinists and tree-huggers.

Most of us will never return, at least not to an institutionalized church. We have zero interest in participating in your silly, religious subculture. Honestly, it’s ridiculous, cheesy, and self-serving. We will never give you our money, which we’d rather spend on rent and alcohol, so that you can make your Lexus payment or add to your building fund.

Do we sound too harsh? Where do you think we learned how to judge?

It may surprise you to find out that, although our church attendance is slipping, we are very interested in spiritual matters, perhaps more so than you. We are desperately searching for something touchable to transcend our lives of quiet desperation. We hate our jobs, we don’t know how to have healthy relationships, we are constantly seeking the next thrill. We are terribly bored and dissatisfied. We are screaming for answers.

We have also learned that we don’t want the life of any adult that we know.

You asked for it, so here’s our wish list:

We want our lives back. You told us that God wants us to live exciting lives, but that’s not what we found. We want our individuality valued. You told us that God created us exactly they way we are for special reasons – why do you invest so much time and energy trying to strip us of our uniqueness so that we can fit inside the same tiny little box you try to put your God into!!! By the way, most of us who may appear at a glance to be lazy are simply unmotivated. We’ll spend hours on creative projects; however, we simply have no desire to participate in a dehumanizing workforce that requires us to leave our individuality at home just to play a monotonous role in making another piece of worthless junk. Give us a reason to put our hearts back into our work.

Teach us HOW to think. You want us to believe that God is Sovereign and self-evident and that absolute truth exists. If He does, then He can speak for Himself. He doesn’t need a hypocritical entourage to defend Him with sleazy, used-car-salesman manipulation tactics. Teach us how to identify spiritual truth and how to spot the work of God in our lives – don’t hand us a pamphlet to memorize.

How about a little compassion? Whether we think Jesus is the Son of God or not, most of us have a favorable opinion of Him and recognize that he knew how to live a selfless life. We may never participate – after all, one of the other things we learned in Sunday school was how to live comfortably with a disconnect between our beliefs and our actions – but if you made honest attempts to follow His example, at least we could respect you.

One last thing: stop trying to make us fill your seats and sing your songs and listen to your sermons before you will “minister” to us. If you have no interest in forming actual human relationships with us, then don’t even bother. We are not projects. We aren’t an untapped market. We don’t need another program. We don’t need another product to consume. We do need friendship and we do need identity. Meet us here, and we might listen. Oh, and by the way, at that point you still might not need to say much because we pick up so much more from watching than from listening.

Sincerely,

Your prodigal slackers

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Wow.

She's my sweet little thang

My wonderful and lovely wife Rotesia gets my attention here on the site tonight. Today, at Warriors Path, our church held a service for their spring festival. Evette(Rotesia) sang a new song for the second week in a row. And it's not just any song. It's a song that she wrote. It's a wonderful testimony and I want to share it here. Please enjoy...

Don’t Look Back

Darkened by the memories of the past

My mind is often weary from the guilt

The pressures of life keep weighing me down

In this home of hurt I’ve built

Hold me Lord I call your name

Only you can take away this pain

I’ve tried so hard to do this on my own

And I’m tired of feeling all alone

Take these fears take these cares

I give them all to you

Take this heart and take this mind

And one more time make them new

Hold me Lord I call your name

Only you can take away this pain

I’ve tried so hard to do this on my own

And I’m tired of feeling all alone

I know you’re here

I know you live

I know the grace and mercy you give

I don’t have to look back

No more looking at the past

I lift my hands I lift my heart

And I offer them to you

Everytime I’ve needed help

I’m amazed by what you do